"How tall are you?" Michael asked me. Candace, Michael, and I were taking a walk to the pier and back at La Jolla shores, mostly because it was freezing, and we needed to warm up a bit. The beach had been my idea because I finally had a Sunday off of work, but it was cold and windy.
"5'11," I told him, "Well, technically, I'm 5'10" and a half." We had just been talking about relationships...again...and had started conversing about dating and tallness. Candace and Michael had been dating for almost a year, and Michael is only a few inches taller than Candace.
I asked Candace, "Would you ever date anyone shorter than you?"
"No way!" she said. "But I'm shorter than you. That would just be weird. When the guy is shorter than me, it makes me feel less feminine. Would you ever date someone shorter than you?"
"Maybe," I thought about it, "But it would depend on the person. It would take someone who was very confident in his skin. Do you know what I mean by that?" I asked. "Someone who is not intimidated by my height."
Candace and Michael nodded.
I continued, "For example, I have a friend who says, 'I feel so short' everytime he stands next to me. I'm okay with my height, but I've had past insecurities. I had to tell him to stop that cause it was going to hurt my feelings. I can't change how tall I am any more than he can change how tall he is. It makes me feel more insecure when guys are insecure around me."
We walked some more in thoughtful silence. I sighed, "There's a lot of short people in San Diego."
Candace and Michael laughed.
Then I stated,"You would think that there would be some tall athletes at least...I mean, we have a pro-football team, a baseball team, a minor league hockey team...So where are they all? Did they get sucked into the void?"
After we laughed some more there was another thoughtful silence.
"So if you guys have any tall, single, Christian friends..." I let the rest of the sentence hang.
"We'll let you know," Candace replied with a smile.
We got back to where we started. "Anyone up for coffee?" I asked.
Everyone was agreeable because it was freezing and besides, what else do people do when they are in their twenties? Maybe that tall, single, Christian guy will be there...
4 comments:
Robyn-you could have used Vance and me as an example of dating with a guy who is shorter than the girl. I really like your dialoge. You should write a book. I would read it :) love-your sis
Thanks sis, you're the best! Thanks for commenting...See? It's not hard.
I think that Christian men are a bit on the short side in general. I was looking at church and realized that I was one of the taller people at my church and I am 6'0" So I think you just have to lower your standards. ;)
For real, I think that girls in general don't like being taller than the guy. If it matters to him he probably won't approach you anyway. But most girls I know would not want a shorter guy. My brother being shorter is a good example. Never dated a woman shorter than himself. Mostly, I think it is because a girl feels uncomfortable, but maybe not!
Ryan,
It totally depends on the girl. I think you're right, a lot of girls wouldn't date a shorter guy, but when you're tall, it becomes more of a possibility, and then it depends on the guy's attitude toward his height and his insecurity (or not) about being tall or short. My sister's boyfriend is shorter than she is, and I met a guy recently who married a girl who is about 4 inches taller than he was. It made me smile.
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