Friday, December 03, 2010

A month later

I was teaching one of my cello students the other day, and one of the things I noticed and wanted to correct was his posture. He was playing with his shoulders  rounded, and both elbows were tucked into his side. It gave the impression that he was huddled around the instrument. The resulting sound while he was playing this way, if you can imagine, was one that sounded pinched, closed off, weak, and scratchy. My advice to him was to open up his posture a little. Sit with the shoulders back, play with both elbows out (so that the wrist and elbows line up... it is a stronger position) and use more bow, meaning apply more pressure of the bow to the string and/or pull the bow faster. After he started playing like that, the sound was much broader, stronger and more open.

I started thinking about the way I have been living life lately, and it is sort of like the closed version above. But when I live like that, my song is sort of pinched, and I feel like something is missing. I am going to take my own advice. Open up a little more, and let my life sing a little louder. Hopefully a happy song.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Musical Dreams

I suppose that one of the dreams I entertain that seems rather impossible to attain is the one in which I get to jam out on cello with musicians from my favorite bands. You know, the ones who have multiple albums and national or world recognition. I would love to have those people in my living room and make music with them.

Well, I sort of had a taste of that last weekend. I went to a retreat and brought my cello because I needed to practice Dvorak's 6th Symphony for the orchestra I'm in. It is a challenging piece, but one I know I can learn well before I have to perform it.

The speaker at this retreat turned out to be THAT kind of musician. We got to play together, just the two of us, on a little deck overlooking a very scenic area of the camp.


Before we started playing, David said to me, "Look at our audience." He pointed to a group of butterflies hanging out in the flowers in front of our stage.


We just played together and then David asked if I would play with him that night at his concert. I said "yes" of course.

As many artists do, I have this complex about being "good enough." I rarely feel like I am. I am constantly comparing myself to other talented musicians. There are so many out there who are more talented than I am, and I can get down on myself for not practicing enough, or having perfect technique, or for not having perfect intonation.

It was a wonderfully affirming experience to play with David for the love of music. We both felt enriched and encouraged for having made music together.

In the end, I think that's what my dream is about-- just playing music for the love of it and feeling affirmed by other talented musicians.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Reading List

Don't just ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive. --Howard Thurman
The place God calls you to is the place where your deep gladness and the world’s deep hunger meet. --Frederick Buechner
"Little girl, what do you want to be when you grow up?" "Alive." --Calvin Miller, The Singer
I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. A bunch of topics in my life have come together and have informed each other, so to speak. Most of the thinking I've been doing has been in regards to the quotes above. The reading I've done lately also speaks to these topics. I'm just going to give you a short list of books I've read in the last two months that have really made me think about my life-- living authentically, purpose, and change.

Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortenson
The Singer by Calvin Miller (this one I reread often!)
Soul of a Citizen : Living with Conviction in a Cynical Time by Paul Loeb
Gospel according to Starbucks by Leonard Sweet

I do a lot of reading. If you were to ask me what I'm reading, I always have something. I reread favorites every night before I sleep (but usually ones that aren't that thought provoking...haha) and since I work in a library, I'm always running into interesting books. I don't usually make book lists because my list is constantly changing. I read very quickly, and so what's on my list today probably won't be there in a week. Reading is something I love to do.

So. Perhaps more to come on the topic of authenticity. If you've read any of these books, I'd be interested to hear what you think.

Thursday, September 09, 2010

Creativity

You know, when I truly feel at peace with myself, that's when I am the most creative. The ideas just flow, and I experience this sense of awe and wonder at the world we live in. It makes me feel whimsical and playful. I don't often feel this way, but it has been happening more lately. I need to remember to continue to give myself the freedom to create without constraint, without fear or judgment and really let myself enjoy the process. It might be a weekend for creating, if I choose to make the time.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Be generous

Last Sunday, I visited a friend's church. I really enjoyed the service. At the end of it, I was given $20 from one of the elders there and was told to "be generous." I have no idea how I want to give this money away. What would you do? The only parameters are to "be generous."

Sunday, August 22, 2010

What I learned at Frog Camp

I had the privilege of attending frog camp this year... the freshman orientation camp at TCU as a staff facilitator. It was a meaningful time for the incoming freshmen. But they aren't the only ones that got to take something away...

I was reminded that it's still important to take time out to be silly and laugh, a lot-- to play in the pool, ride on the water slides, play foosball and run through sprinklers.

I was reminded that it's never too late to see each day as an opportunity to connect with people, to value them, and to listen.

I was reminded that the only regrets I will continue to have are when I refuse to take action toward the changes I want to see in my life or the goals I want to accomplish.

I am really looking forward to the new academic year.

With or without words?

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Sequoia Sunset

I decided to try some more collaging tonight. My piece is still drying, but I think I like it... not sure yet. :) So here, it is still wet. I may edit this post later once this is dry.















I based this collage on this picture:

Wednesday, August 04, 2010

Exciting times

So. I finally bought a newer car. It runs so well. I'm still in the process of figuring out what to do with my old one (that doesn't run). I went to Bethany, OK with a friend of mine. We stayed with her Aunt and Uncle up there. Her Uncle, Doug, knows everyone in town up there, and he knew I was looking for something. He had scouted out this car for me and I got a sweet deal on it because he knew the owners. They were so nice! And I didn't feel like I was signing over my life. Anyways. I'm waiting to get the title in the mail and then I can get it registered.

Sometimes I have these fleeting fantasies about having my close friends in town. I wish I could live in the same town as my friend Laurel. We are friends from college, and we came close once. She lived in L.A. and I lived in L.A. County. I'm sad we didn't see each other more and now we live REALLY far away from each other. Laurel, don't you want to move to TX???  Haha. Anyways, my friend Tara called me today and guess what? She and her husband are moving here next month! I can't believe it! We met each other in San Diego and I got to watch her fall in love and get married to her husband. He got a job here and it was sort of a 1 in 5 chance that he would get this particular job. Tara asked me about my complex (which I love) and so not only are they moving here, but they might be my neighbors. I am so excited!

Friday, July 23, 2010

Losing things, like my mind

I have a lot going on in my life right now. When I go silent on the blog, it usually means my mind is working overtime. My car, the trusty 1995 Mercury Tracer, has finally died. It has served me well over the years, but the time has come for me to get a newer car. The timing isn't great, since I do not feel like I'm in the best financial position to get something right now. However, I do need reliable transportation. Mostly because I do earn extra income from teaching lessons and performing.

Because my car is essentially dead (I do not feel safe driving it), I have been using my bike as my main mode of transportation. This has been great! I get my workout in for the day riding to work and back (about 12 miles round trip). I tried taking the front wheel off and back on (got a ride from someone) and when I went to put the wheel back on, I couldn't get it on! So I had to take it to the bike shop, which I did today. Turns out I wasn't just an idiot, something had gone wrong with the slot where the tire is supposed to go. All fixed now, thankfully.

However, because of this whole car/transportation situation, I have a lot on my mind. Whenever I am subconsciously stressed out, I start losing track of things that I normally do not lose track of, like my wallet. I have lost it twice in the last two weeks. The first time, I knew I dropped it at work somewhere, but it was missing long enough that I decided to replace my credit cards. Then a coworker found it. I had dropped it under the service desk chair that we all use. I was so relieved!

Then I lost it again last night. That was much worse. A friend of mine is visiting from California, and we went to the Rangers/Angels game last night. That's where I lost my wallet. I realized it was missing as we were leaving. It took me some time to retrace my steps and then ask where lost and found was located. Thankfully, someone turned it in. I apparently dropped it in the bathroom.

I am so relieved that there are still honest people in this world. So glad I have my wallet.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Touring

I just got back from a fun little road trip. Went on a "mini-tour" with Vanessa Peters. It was so fun! First, we went to Dosey Doe's, a venue in the outskirts of Houston. We got to play in an old barn. It had been moved there from Kansas and the sound set-up was amazing! My cello has never sounded better.

The next night, we played at a hotel lounge in Austin. That's the kind of show where no one really listens. We considered it (jokingly) a paid rehearsal. It was our best show yet, which is kind of sad really, because no one was really there or watching. And what I mean by "best show" is that we were the most together we've been of all the times we played together.

Our ride was a volkswagon stationwagon, and we got a PA system, two guitars, a keyboard + stand, my cello, a bass drum, snare drum, hi-hat, our luggage, miscellaneous gear, and three people in the wagon. It was amazing!

I had a really good time "on tour" and hope to do it again someday.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Summer Travels

I did want to write about my summer travels. I went back to CA in June to go to a wedding for a friend of mine in San Diego. It was beautiful, and I'm so glad I got to go back and see most of my friends. I got to go to Woodstocks with a bunch of people I love, and it sort of turned into a reunion, because many of them hadn't seen each other in awhile either. It was a good time to catch up, chill, and enjoy some awesome pizza! I also got to spend a few nights with one of my sisters.

Since she and her husband are both youth ministers, I was informed that they were doing a car wash fundraiser on the Saturday I was staying with them. So I washed a bunch of cars and got an awesome flip-flop tan line on my feet.

Some other highlights included seeing Kenny, who made a special effort to get down to SD from Irvine to spend some time with me, staying with my friend Beryl and having breakfast near the beach before my flight left, and visiting my old coworkers in Point Loma.

Then I flew to Fresno to spend some time with my two brothers, my sister-in-law, and my new nephew! He was born about a week before I got to Fresno. I stayed with my other brother and his roommates. That was really fun. I also made a new friend! Adam (my brother) recently rented a room to one of his old friends, Brad. Brad had recently been accepted to a medical residency program in the area and needed a place to stay. My brother is so nice. Also, Brad had been recently married, so I got to meet his wife since she came to stay with him that weekend. We spent a good amount of time together and I'm glad I have a new friend!

On the day I was supposed to leave Fresno to fly back to Texas, my brother's dog had to go to the vet. Turned out he had a nasty staph infection. This delayed the time I was supposed to get to the airport. My brother's roommate, Nate, agreed to take me. We used the GPS on his phone to get there, only it took us to the wrong location. Bottom line: I totally missed my flight. But, not a big deal, I was able to get on standby for the next day, and I didn't have to be at work for two days.

Well, the next day came, and the flight got majorly delayed, and then ultimately, canceled. Since I was already flying standby, I got bumped to the end of the line. I finally got out of Fresno three days later. Ironically, I both dropped off Adam and Nate at the airport the night I missed my flight and picked up Adam when he arrived back in town. I'm glad I had family in town, but on the whole, this was a very frustrating experience. I was so relieved to get back to Texas!

Thursday, July 01, 2010

Vacation

What a trip! I just got back from my vacation to California, to the lovely cities of San Diego and Fresno. I had a great time-- got to see most of the people I wanted to see and went to a wedding, which was fun and beautiful. I got to attend this one, I didn't have to play cello at this wedding.

I also got to meet my new nephew who was born on June 18. Welcome to the world, Hudson! He looks exactly like my brother did (his daddy) at birth.

My vacation was a very nice break from life, though I find that how I'm back, I feel like I'm trying to play catch-up, and get my life together, for really good reasons.

Since I've been in Texas, I've been working on building up a community of musicians, and a music network. I've been working on making connections, for both teaching cello lessons and performing. All my hard work is paying off! I met a great musician here in DFW, Vanessa Peters, and I will be playing with her for three shows this month in Dallas, Houston, and Austin. I get to go on my very first mini-tour! (If you can call two shows a tour, haha!). I am really looking forward to these gigs, Vanessa is a great musician and a fun person to be around.

I have been working on finding students to teach. My goal has been to find four students, and right now, I have three. One more to go! So if any of you are interested in lessons... uh, let me know. Comments.

What this means is that I have been having to seriously work on my scheduling abilities.
(I will not double book,
I will not double book,
I will not double book...)

I'm finding that I now must practice a lot of new music so I'm also working on scheduling personal practice sessions. Practicing music is a lot like choosing to exercise for me. I never feel like doing either, but I know it's good for me, and I'll feel better after I do it.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Art Experiments: 4












So, I was playing around with images, washes, and paper today. Then I realized that these images were much more interesting when I put them all together.This picture makes them look a little better (brighter) than they actually are. I am more inclined to throw these ones out than to keep them, but at the same time, I could also choose to use them in a future project.

Tuesday, June 01, 2010

Homesick

I'm feeling a little homesick and lonely this week. Nothing helps a little homesickness like reviewing pictures with friends and family. Here's a spectacular sunset that I got to see with friends back in January in San Diego. This is at Coronado Beach.

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Tissue and glue...sort of...

My two favorite experimental results from tonight's art experiments. Playing with different kinds of paper and medium matte. Fun! Obviously, I liked the tissue paper best, though I also used some cardstock for each of these as well. I like the texture the tissue paper creates.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Swatches

Okay, so the experiment here was to just go through a bunch of magazines and find colors that you like, glue the "swatches" to paper, and then see what colors you tend to use the most. I found this to be an interesting exercise. I must admit, I do really like bold colors, red, yellow, orange, but I also really like the cool ones-- blues and greens. Most of my house is decorated in shades of green (my favorite color).

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Art Experiments

I bought this art book a few weeks ago and it has experiments to try. So I tried one yesterday.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Church Search: Update

These last two months, I have visited six different churches. I am really drawn to one of them in particular, but there's this guy who goes there that I know, and I'm not very comfortable interacting with him. I feel like there are very few people I feel skeptical about, and he is one of them. I really like this church. But it's too small to avoid interacting with this guy. I feel really stupid or something for reacting this way, but I need to feel safe and comfortable wherever I decide to attend.

The church I currently attend comes in second to this one, and I've nearly convinced myself that it's where I want to be. My reasons for looking beyond this church were because I didn't feel like the community I wanted existed there, however, I feel like they are slowly improving in that area. I know that I could help facilitate that change, if I choose to be there.

But I'm still feeling uncertain. I am indecisive. Tired of trying new things. Tired of feeling like I'm in transition. I feel like the list of churches I came up with were the best possible options in town. I'm still sort of feeling like I still haven't found what I'm looking for... and I'm a little scared it doesn't really exist.

Should I disregard the weird guy at church and attend the church that I felt was the best fit for me at church #1 (am I being dumb?)? Choose to make a difference at church#2? Or try some more churches (potential church #3)?

I feel so confused...

Saturday, May 01, 2010

Thoughts about and experiments in Christian meditation

One of the ideas frequently mentioned in the Bible is that of mediation. Just a few examples:
Do not let this book of the law depart from your mouth, meditate on it day and night...
Give ear to my words, Oh Lord, Consider my meditation...
I often feel like one of those hypocritical Christians because I pray so rarely. It often feels beyond my comprehension to sit down and "connect" to an entity that I do not fully understand. What I DO know is that I long for this connection, and that I am very out of practice in my ability to pray and/or meditate.

As I re-read the chapter on meditation in Richard Foster's Celebration of Discipline, I was reminded that people learn meditation by meditating. Christian meditation is really about making space to experience the presence of God. Foster writes:
What happens in meditation is that we create the emotional and spiritual space which allows Christ to construct an inner sanctuary in the heart (20).
Foster also makes a great connection between meditation and imagination. He writes:
Perhaps some rare individuals experience God through abstract contemplation alone, but most of us need to be more deeply rooted in our senses...Even more, the imagination helps to anchor our thoughts and center our attention (25).

One of the things I've realized lately is that I am also out of practice in using my imagination. For a long time, I have been squashing my dreams, hopes, and thus, also my creativity. Most people I know would describe me as a creative person, and being creative is something that I would say I value. However, I am experiencing a gap in my life (at the moment) in this area. The reality is that I am unable to be creative without using my imagination. It should come as no surprise then, that I've found I have difficulty being creative and finding things that inspire my creativity. I'm not certain what commentary in the world I've been listening to, but it hasn't been very positive or validating. Somehow, I have let the "voices in my head" tell me that imagining is silly, unproductive and a waste of time.

The truth is, that those who are the most imaginative and those who are the dreamers are really those who can most make a difference in the world if they choose to do so.

I think I'm ready to dust off my rusty imagination and see what may come of it. That, and start practicing some meditation in my life.

Friday, April 30, 2010

Camp!

I'm kind of excited because I recently met the assistant director of student development at the university where I work and he suggested I apply to be a staff partner for their camps for incoming students. So I signed up this week! I'm very excited. The particular camp I'm attending is a weekend long challenge competition. It's gonna be fun!

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Church Search

I visited not one but TWO churches on Sunday last week. The first was because they asked me to come play cello, which I did.

Then I went to another service after that at another church. That's an interesting story. As I was doing my research for churches, I came across one where I couldn't find the service times listed anywhere on their website. If it had been my website, I would have wanted to know that this information was missing. So I emailed the church through their contact form to ask them what time they meet and hinted that the service times were missing. The helpful receptionist responded with the service times. When I checked the website again, the times still weren't on the web page.

I sort of forgot about it for a week or two, until another friend and I were talking about web usability, and I told her about this church's website. After we talked, I was like, "I'm emailing them, they need to know!" So I looked at their staff page and emailed the guy who's job description and bio most closely resembled that of a web master. Well, he immediately responded back. He got the times up on the site. As a result of this incident, we started writing a bit more back and forth. The church I visited on Sunday was the one that he attends. I think I've made a new friend.

All that to say I'm surprised sometimes by how friendships form.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Visiting

So I just got back from church. It was my first time trying something different since last July. The service was more my style, so I felt relieved that there's something out there that I like. However, I'm also feeling guilty for leaving my old one. I've told two people there that I was considering trying out some other churches. Also, now I have to decide whether to try out the other churches on my list or keep going back to this one for a bit. I think I'm leaning more toward checking out the others on my list and then making a decision. However, it's such a lonely process.

I was thinking about how there's this regular article in the free magazine in San Diego. There's an anonymous writer who goes to a different church every week and rates it based on a scale that he or she created. Maybe I should create my own rating system?

I'm trying to prepare myself for at least a month of awkwardness, and then I'm trying to tell myself that "no, it's NOT awkward, it's an adventure!" It's all about perspective, right?

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Jokes, in honor of tax day

I was just rewatching a video I took of my friend Laurel's kid last year. I had totally forgotten these jokes that she and her husband taught her, and I think it's more her husband really. This kid was about 3 at the time I took the video. Though I do not have strong political leanings,  it was really funny to hear these answers come out of her mouth:

What do cows say?
"Moo"
What else do cows say?
"Sizzle, sizzle"
What do Republicans say?
"No taxes!"
What do Democrats say?
"Hee haw"

Hope you enjoy these.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Cellist for hire

If you haven't figured it out already from reading my blog, I play the cello, and I really love playing. If you live in the Dallas or Fort Worth area, I would love to play for your next event. I have over 20 years of experience as a musician.

I have played for many weddings, parties, and bands over the years, and it's been really fun. Of all the things I do musically, playing for events is what I love the most. I love the camaraderie  with my fellow musicians and making the music sound great. Live music really adds a bit of class to these events.

I used to live in San Diego, and that's where these pictures were taken-- for my sister's wedding! It was at the beach, and it was a perfect day.

Now that I have lived in Texas for a bit, I have met other musicians in town-- guitarists and other string players, so I can put an ensemble together if you want as well. If you're interested, you can email me at elegantcellist at gmail dot com. Seriously. It would be a pleasure.

More weird dreams!

In my dream, I was spending some time with a friend of mine. I knew who this person was, but he did not look anything like what he looks like in real life. His essence was the same as what I knew though. So weird.

Friday, April 09, 2010

Resistance

Today at the chiropractor, I got to do some resistance training with bungee cords. I have not done any weight training for the last 2 years. The funny part of this is that my right arm is WAY weaker than my left. I blame the cello.

PS: I am right-handed.

Wednesday, April 07, 2010

Serving

I was just thinking about a comment someone made to me recently. He said, "you're brave to let your church know you have a talent."

I don't feel brave, I feel called to use my talents in service. If my talent is something that God has given me, and something that I'm passionate about, then using this gift and serving the church isn't a burden, it's more like something I can't help but do. Service becomes something I can't resist.

Anyone feel the same? Different? I'm curious.

Thursday, March 04, 2010

Audition Update

So when I went to audition, the auditioner did not show up. She wrote down the wrong date. Also, my parents happened to be in town last weekend, and I felt bad because I had to practice for about five hours while they were here. I managed to reschedule my audition for last Monday night. I played some Bach, Brahms, and Mozart. You know, the classics. I gotta say, I was thinking that I wasn't going to play the Mozart piece but had been practicing it. Just go google "Marriage of Figaro" and you'll see why I was nervous about playing it. I played just the very first part. I did not feel like I played very well, but I told the auditioners that and mentioned that though I didn't play as well as I thought I could, I am a team player and I practice. All that to say that they let me in! I'm so excited. First concert: March 14. That's soon! I will be in a lot of rehearsals next week, but I'm SO looking forward to them.

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Audition!

I am freaking out a little...

I had been told that there was a group of "hotshots" in an orchestra in Fort Worth. I checked out their website only to find that they had no spots open for cellists. However, I was looking on Craigslist yesterday, and saw that they had put an ad up for auditions. Problem was they were last weekend. Well, I emailed them anyway to find out if they would still let me try out. The good news is yes, they will. The bad news is that my audition is this weekend. I am SO not prepared. I practiced some Bach this morning to start preparing. I'm thankful that I have performed some solos in the last year, so I am not having to relearn anything, more just pick it up and brush it off. I also have to play three orchestral excerpts. I have not practiced seriously for orchestral stuff in a while. Thankfully, the library where I work has one book of orchestral excerpts for cello. Now all I have to do is pick three of them to practice and play. Oh yeah, and I get to try to practice these and audition with my parents in town. Good times.

I really, really, want to get into this orchestra. I'm really, really, trying not to get my hopes up. I fear the disappointment of rejection. Which is very possible. I have NEVER passed an orchestral audition on the first try.

Monday, February 22, 2010

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Churches

I have been attending the same church for about six months now, and though I like it, I have come to the conclusion that it may not be the best fit for me. It seems so hard to decide that I need to go looking again, but it is important to me to find a place that makes me feel "at home."

It has been hard for me to figure out exactly what it is that is causing me to not fully commit to the church I'm currently attending, but have realized after some clarifying conversations that I need to find "my people" at church-- the ones who like to ask questions, be creative, explore scripture in depth, and feel comfortable with deep conversations. I can say with gratitude that I have made some friends at this church, friends that will become better friends as time passes. But before I decide that this church is where I want to be, I need to see if there might be a church out there that better fits me. I feel kind of weird saying that.

I am grateful that I do have the opportunity to choose where I attend. That was made abundantly clear to me, by a service in a very small town, that was close to the only option people had to attend. I'm thankful for the option to look, and I'm hoping that in the end, I will find my place.

I'm curious about what people think about this idea of looking for a church... What do people look for in their churches? How do you feel about the process?

Service Project

I just got back from a service project in Oklahoma. I'm tired, and I really don't want to go back to work tomorrow. I went with a small group from church to a residential school for boys. We were given the task of tearing down the siding of a shed, and then rebuilding it. In that process, we also cleaned out the inside of the shed by pulling everything out, trashing the stuff that needed to be trashed, and putting everything back inside. It looks a lot better. Things I did this weekend on this trip included:
  • Digging ditches
  • Raking dirt
  • Lifting heavy stuff-- like plywood and concrete
  • Wrapping power cords correctly
  • Tree-climbing
  • Dumping stuff in dumpsters
  • Making faces at the camera guy
  • Entertaining people with my guitar playing skills (or lack thereof)
  • Eating lots of beef
Pictures will surface eventually. I did not take my camera, but lots of other people did take theirs. It was a really good trip. I loved the working, conversing, the road trip, the getting to know people better. It was all good. I love all the open spaces that we drove through, and in the end, it was refreshing to get away to a beautiful place this weekend.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Trusting

For once, I had a dream that wasn't related to anxiety. I dreamed I was leading worship for elementary aged children, and there were a lot of them. I was playing my guitar and singing a song that is word for word Proverbs 3:5-6: Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight. I sang this song at least five times. The last time I sang it live was probably sometime last March.

I have been feeling a bit restless about life this week. This dream was a good reminder to just take a break-- create space, breathe, meditate, and trust.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Playing Hookie

I was at breakfast yesterday when I got a call from my coworker and friend, Laura. I ignored it and called her back a little later. When she answered the phone, this is the conversation we had:

Me: Hey Laura, what's up?
L, anxiously: Oh good! You're alive!
Me: What?
L: Well, are you coming in [to work]?
Me: The library is open today???
L: Well, yeah.
Me: What??? It's President's day...
L: Well, we're open.
Me (sheepish and resigned): I guess I'll be taking a vacation day.

I have had President's Day off every year for about 30 years. I assumed that I had the day off here as well. I was wrong. I felt so lame for not going in. The funny part is that I think I would have figured this out if we hadn't had the two snow days last week.

I had a really fun day off though, and had a five day weekend last weekend. So I do not regret it one bit.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Snow Day!

I woke up this morning at about 6am as a result of a text message from the campus alert system. Campus is closed! Today and tomorrow! Although I found out about the closure for tomorrow about an hour ago. It has been snowing since early this morning in Fort Worth, and according to the news, this is the largest snowfall they've had in 30 years. I just went to check out the trail behind my apartment complex and it's pretty! I took some pictures so you could see.


































































Tuesday, February 09, 2010

Intensity

I don't know why, but I'm feeling intense about life in general, but when I try to pinpoint what exactly this is about, I can't name any one particular thing. Things are going well, you see, so I feel like I really shouldn't be feeling this way. I'm just going to say that "intensity" feels a little like anxiety, but the two feelings are different. I don't feel like I'm anxious, just intense. I realize this is a weird post.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Support

As of late, I have been jogging weekly with a friend of mine. I have noticed that when we're running together, I'm able to run faster and farther than if I were to run by myself. When we jog, I'm able to go three miles, and sometimes more. But this morning, I got up and went for a jog, but I was so tired that I couldn't even run a quarter of a mile without stopping.

There's this story in the Bible about Elijah-- with the strength of the Lord, he is able to run 40 miles, from one city to another. Later, he tries to run away from Jezebel, this evil queen, and he can't even get more than a few miles away, because he tries to do it outside of the strength of God.

I guess I've just been thinking about that and how much more I am able to accomplish with God's help, and the support of others around me.

Monday, January 25, 2010

Hey you... Listen up!

I've been loving the sermon series this month at my church. I kind of feel like I'm really going to commit to going there.

Last week, what I remember from the sermon is the part about Christian meditation. I think it was about connecting with God. I had just re-read the chapter on meditation from Celebration of Discipline by Richard Foster and the pastor talked about that in the sermon!

I've been realizing that it is important for me to go walk, pray, and meditate, which really means focusing on God, listening for his voice, or dwelling on the promises he has given me. I find that when I practice this, I feel more grounded and peaceful. However, it is really hard for me to make this a priority. I often feel like I don't have time. But I need to make time.

This week, the sermon was about whether coincidences really are coincidences or whether they are really acts of God. I have had a few experiences where I know that the "coincidences" in my life really were directed by God.

Recently, I thought it was interesting that I had been thinking about meditation, and what that really means, or looks like, read the chapter by Foster, and then heard a sermon. I think there's something to that repetition... God is trying to tell me something... hopefully I'm listening.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

A cello walks into a bar...

I taught my first cello lesson last Sunday, and then went to watch the Chargers game with some friends at a bar. Well, I took the cello into the bar with me because I generally don't like leaving it in my car. The bar was empty on our side because everyone had been watching the Cowboys game (of course) and had cleared out. No one really cares too much about the Chargers here. I'm not surprised by this.

During the third quarter of the game, this guy comes up to me, asks me if my instrument is a cello, and then tells me he's a cellist. I'm immediately skeptical for a number of reasons:
  1. He's slightly intoxicated
  2. He asked what instrument was in the case...if he was a cellist, he would have said something like, "How long have you played the cello?"
  3. He was guarded in answering all the questions I asked him about playing the cello.
Well, then he sits down and pretends to play, and that's when I know for sure that while he may be a "playa," he's definitely not a player. His technique on air cello--not so good.

Turns out that most of the people at the bar were in the other room and made a bet with this guy that I wouldn't let him play my cello. He admits this, and then asks if I would play. Pretty soon, a bunch of people from the other room walk in and want to see me play. I'm like, "Seriously? Does this mean I get tips???"

So I got talked into playing and I played three songs. I made $6.00. I will also never forget that day. Ever. It was a memorable experience.

Friday, January 15, 2010

The future, predictable?

I was working on a project for one of the history profs today, and went browsing our reference collection (I work at the library). I found my new favorite reference source. Are you ready? It is the Encyclopedia of the Future! (published in 1996).

I haven't browsed it yet, but I'm sure the future is fascinating. Especially from the context of 1996.

Comments? :)

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Fake!

I'm working the evening shift tonight at the library. For dinner, I went to my favorite taco place. I could have sworn I heard them playing Milli Vanilli on the radio as I left... "Girl, you know it's true/ooo ooo ooo, I love you..." So weird to be hearing a song that was a hit and yet diminished in it's status as a result of the controversy surrounding the group...

Saturday, January 09, 2010

Crafty!

I realized I really needed to get some artwork up in my bathroom because it is very neutral. After going to a number of crafty-type stores today, I knew I was going to have to make my own. It always amazes me that my initial idea always morphs into something cool and different. So here's what I made today. The angle is weird cause I didn't want the lights reflecting off of the glass in the frame:


So this is kind of funny to me, because it is still too neutral. Oh well. It looks cool. I was going to use the part I cut out on top of some other, more colorful paper, and then changed my mind because the inverse looked neat. Anyways.

Tuesday, January 05, 2010

Vacation

I'm at my sister's place in San Diego. I was going to go for a jog this morning in the lovely Cali sunshiny weather, but I ran out of time. I'm waiting for my friend to come pick me up. I think we're going to go for a walk and then have lunch after. I miss my friends here so much. I'm committed to staying in Texas for awhile. I'm not moving back to CA anytime soon. Part of my homesickness is dealing with that idea.

I am making new friends in Texas, but I'm feeling that it takes a lot of time to develop the deepness that I crave in friendships. So I have made some friends in Texas that I think will become good friends, but it is going to take me some time to work on them.

Sunday, January 03, 2010

Hide and seek

I'm still on vacation, and it's nice. I've been all up and down the California coast. I have lots of stories from this trip already and it isn't over yet.

I got to go to Big Bear with the fam. I have an eight year old niece, and she, like most little kids, wants to play all the time. My three sisters offered to play hide and seek with her while the rest of us were hangin' out in the living room. I was sitting by the fire and watching TV in the middle of the game when my sister Megan comes up to me and says, "Quick! Give me your sweater and hat!" I was like, "Okay..." so I gave her the sweater and hat. Then she says, "Now GO HIDE!" So I did. The count was to 30, and my niece was on 20 when I had to go hide. So I ran to the closet and hid in there. Well, apparently, my niece walked right by Megan, and then came to the closet where I was hiding. She opened the door and I said, "Hi!" and scared her. My niece says, "Hey, you weren't playing this game, were you?" Meanwhile, my other sister, who was helping my niece find people starts laughing. We all walk back into the living room where Megan is wearing my hat and my sweater and doing a great job looking like me. We are seven years apart, but we we look a lot alike. We have always looked alike even though there are a lot of years between us and we have the same build. My niece still didn't figure it out even with both of us in the same room. My step-mom had to cover her face with a pillow to keep from laughing out loud.

I'm not sure that Megan and I could ever pull this trick again, but it was so funny that she was able to hide in plain sight.