Cellist for hire

If you haven't figured it out already from reading my blog, I play the cello, and I really love playing. If you live in the Dallas or Fort Worth area, I would love to play for your next event. I have over 20 years of experience as a musician.

I have played for many weddings, parties, and bands over the years, and it's been really fun. Of all the things I do musically, playing for events is what I love the most. I love the camaraderie  with my fellow musicians and making the music sound great. Live music really adds a bit of class to these events.

I used to live in San Diego, and that's where these pictures were taken-- for my sister's wedding! It was at the beach, and it was a perfect day.

Now that I have lived in Texas for a bit, I have met other musicians in town-- guitarists and other string players, so I can put an ensemble together if you want as well. If you're interested, you can email me at elegantcellist at gmail dot com. Seriously. It would be a pleasure.

Conversations 11 - My new doctor

My new doctor: So, tell me, what should I know about you?
Me: Well, I've lost 50 pounds in the last two years.
Doctor: That's quite a chunk!
Me: I feel much better.
Doctor: Your back is probably better too. So tell me, how did you do it?
Me: Diet and exercise.
Doctor (with mock disbelief): Nooo, really?! That works? You lost weight by changing your diet and exercising?
Me (laughing): Well, yes.
Doctor: You should write a book or something.
Me: With all the stuff that's already been written?
Doctor: Well, they always say 'Try this! It really works' and then the diet and exercise part is usually a much smaller section.
Me: So I guess I'm almost where I want to be...I mean, you tell me...
Doctor (looking at a table): You're about how tall? 5'11"?
Me: Yes.
Doctor: 172 and you weighed in at...(checks my chart)...174? Okay, and that's with your clothes, and your heavy necklace, and your shoes...
Me (laughing): Yeah. So now I guess I need to figure out how to eat for maintenance. I've been eating to lose for so long, and now I am going to have to figure that out.
Doctor: Well, you're still going to have to pay attention to your weight a bit.
Me: I know. I can say that am unlikely to gain it back unless I have a terrible injury or something.
Doctor: Well, good job.

25

This is copied over from my Facebook profile. Basically, this is a meme that's been going around. I caught it like a cold. Ha. What you're supposed to do is tell people 25 little known facts about yourself and then "tag" people to do the same. So here's my list of 25 little known facts about me:

1. My biggest fear is losing my teeth. I have dreams about this. The funny thing is that I have actually lost a tooth already and now have a fake tooth. I'm still frightened that I may lose the rest though.

2. The dream I have the hardest time admitting even to myself is that if I could, I would totally be a full-time studio musician.

3. If you ask me to go bowling, I will tell you that I will come hang out, but that I will not bowl. The reason is because I cannot bowl. The last time I went bowling was in 2002, and I significantly hurt my back. I do not want to risk having another significant injury like that, therefore I will never bowl again.

4. I think crows are fascinating birds. My fascination with crows began when I read Rascal by Sterling North which was more about a boy and his pet raccoon. However, it also featured a crow. I don't necessarily want a crow as a pet, but I would love to befriend one.

5. I love telling stories. I don't think I could ever write a novel, but I do enjoy writing short stories that are based on events that have happened in my life.

6. I have thought about trying to write a webcomic. I took a cartooning class at a summer camp once and enjoy writing my own comics sometimes. I think my strength is more in the writing part than the drawing part, so if any illustrators out there are interested in a collaborative project, let me know!

7. I *almost* tried out for a women's professional football team (tackle football), but then decided it would be too hard on my body. I still like to play. I'm a decent defender. I played a game of flag football in college once and managed to sack the (male) quarterback three times in one game, even after counting "alligators." I don't think he liked me all that much after that. :(

8. I am not only the oldest sibling in my immediate family, but the oldest of all my cousins, on both sides of the family. I used to wish I had an older sibling, but I have come to realize that being the oldest has its perks.

9. I am a VERY fast reader. I can read about 100 pages an hour. That's just an estimate. My speed is dependent upon how complex the writing is. My siblings have always been in awe of this skill that I have and once tried to count how many pages I read in two minutes. I was not paying attention and didn't realize they were doing this until I felt all of them staring at me while I was reading.

10. I can't WAIT until I'm able to have a dog. I've always wanted one. I will probably adopt one at a pound once I have the money and the space.

11. I'm really good at getting songs stuck in people's heads. Unless you want the song stuck in your head too, don't ask me what it is. It is rare that I'm not subconsciously singing or humming something in my head. I may also hum out loud without realizing that I'm doing it.

12. I am an instigator. I have a lot of ideas. Not all of them are good. But I often find that my ideas influence people. When I tell people that I am an instigator, they do not take me seriously. In a recent conversation, I earned new respect from my friends when they realized the extent of my ability to instigate. I hope to use my powers for good and not evil. But I do love a good prank. ;)

13. Most people think I'm extroverted. I'm not. I'm a really social introvert. My Myer's Briggs type is INTP, but I'm not the extremist version of this type. I have trouble sometimes molding myself into a more structured society as I like variety and am extremely adaptable. This also makes me indecisive and means that I tend to try to keep options open, sometimes to my own detriment.

14. For the last three Christmases, my family has tried to play "Stump Robyn with words from the dictionary" game, which means they find a random word in the dictionary and see if I know the meaning. The funny part is that they can't always pronounce the words they are trying to stump me with and I have often corrected their pronunciation...which means I have known the word and its meaning.

15. I have two master's degrees. What? I just like learning. One is in Education and one is in Library and Information Science. My goal is to be an instruction librarian at a college or university.

16. Though I am a musician, I am terrible at remembering (and knowing) lyrics, titles and artists of songs. People always try to make me do the humdingers in cranium because I can hum in tune, but I RARELY know what the song is on the card. Unless it's classical, don't make me do those, okay?

17. I am tall, 5'11'' (which most of you already know) but I am the shortest of my biological siblings. I like to say I'm the short kid in my family. Take a look at my photos in the family section and think about the fact that I'm 5'11''.

18. I always loved PE in school. I never understood why the other girls didn't.

19. My pet peeves include wet socks, earwax in my ear, when my fingernails are too long and they click on things, um, I know I have a few more, but those are the main ones.

20. I probably own way too many hats. But I like them, and I love wearing them. Most of them are baseball hats.

21. I'm pretty serious most of the time. But I have a good sense of fun and appreciate people who try to help me be less serious.

22. I hate arriving late to things. I get anxious when I'm running late or when my friends don't show up on time. If you're gonna be later than 15 min, please call me!

23. I love being outside.

24. My first job was as a lifeguard at Raging Waters in San Dimas. I worked as a deep water guard (wave cove!) even though people weren't supposed to work there until they were 18. Basically, I kicked booty in the swim test and I looked older so they asked me why I wasn't trying out for deep guard. When I told them it was because I was 16, they didn't care and moved me over. I am still a very good swimmer.

25. I once met Walter Cronkite in person. I was a history major at UCSB. My senior seminar was in modern American history. Cronkite was doing a lecture that night on campus and wanted to visit a class. There were 16 of us writing about events in the 1900's, and as we told him our topics, he provided commentary on each one. This was an amazing experience.

Self-Evaluation Exercise

I recently was asked to ask ten people the following question: What shows up when I show up? What do I bring into a room?

The first three responses I had to get in the span of about ten minutes. The rest I've been gathering along the way. I pulled out the most common qualities mentioned by my friends and family:

• conversation (5)
• friendliness (3)
• calmness (2)
• comfort (2)
• deepness (2)
• home (2)
• humor (2)
• including (2)
• intelligence (2)
• peace (2)
• put others at ease (2)
• realness (2)
• safety (2)
• welcoming (2)

I actually have to figure out one more person to call.

Skillz

Skillz
I was wearing my "I got Skills" shirt so I thought I would update you all on my skills. As of today (a la Napoleon Dynamite):

• Googling skillz
• Fly Swatting Skillz
• Cello-ing Skillz
• Endurance Walking Skillz
• Rock Climbing Skillz
• Secret Researching Skillz
• Digitization Skillz
• Paper Airplane Making Skillz
• and Speed Reading Skillz.

(I might create a new list everytime I wear the shirt)

A fun survey

What is your idea of perfect happiness?
-Knowing that I'm accomplishing my purpose in life AND experiencing open spaces.

What is your greatest fear?
-Losing my teeth AND not taking any risks.

Which historical figure do you most identify with?
-Rosie the Rivetor aka women who went to work during WWII.

Which living person do you most admire?
-I'm very curious about any people that have charisma... that unexplicable charm.

What is the trait that you most deplore in yourself?
-Selfishness

What is the trait you most deplore in others?
-Illogical thinking.

What is your greatest extravagance?
-Books and education.

What is your favorite journey?
-To Africa and back.

What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
-I don't know if it is a virture, but I would say "peace--" the fake overrated kind.

On what occasion do you lie?
-When I'm trying to hide.

Which living person do you most despise?
-I try not to despise people, but I don't like know-it-alls.

Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
-What?

What is your greatest regret?
-That I don't take risks and therefore miss opportunities.

What or who is the greatest love of your life?
-I don't know.

When and where were you happiest?
-Working at summer camp. Lifeguarding.

Which talent would you most like to have?
-I always wanted to be a drummer.

What is your current state of mind?
-Reflective and nostolgic.

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
-That I didn't care so much about what other people think.

What do you consider your greatest achievement?
-I don't know...graduating college was pretty cool. I still have time to achieve my greatest achievement, right?

If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what do you think it would be?
-Because of my Christian beliefs, I would have to say a more real, more complete version of myself.

What is your most treasured possession?
-My cello. It has given me ways to connect with people in ways I never would have if I didn't play.

What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
-Living without hope.

Where would you like to live?
-Anywhere good friends can be found.

What is your most marked characteristic?
-When I'm feeling confident and self-assured, I can talk to anyone and make them feel included. Either that or my seriousness.

What is the quality you most like in a man?
-Kindness and honesty.

What is the quality you most like in a woman?
-Kindness and honesty.

What do you most value in your friends
?-Their ability to be genuine and serious and funny.

Who are your favorite writers?
-Madeline L'Engle, and C.S. Lewis.

Who is your favorite hero of fiction?
-Aslan the Lion.

Who are your heroes in real life?
-People who pray.

What is it that you most dislike?
-Arrogance and dishonesty.

How would you most like to die?
-A morbid question, but I would have to say I'd like to die without pain.

What is your motto?
-Hope.

Music I listen to

Every once in awhile, I get captivated by a song. It doesn't happen very often, where I hear a song that grabs my attention and I want to buy the album as a result. I prefer to wait until I realize that I like at least half the songs on an album before I purchase it. One of the only times I bought an album for one song was when I bought Dizzy Up the Girl by the Goo Goo Dolls because of the song "Iris."

"Iris" has a chorus that goes like this,

And I don't want the world to see me,
cause I don't think that they'd understand,
when everything's made to be broken,
I just want you to know who I am.

Plus it has a pretty cool cello part. Anyway, it happened to me again, where I heard a song that just captivated my attention and I immediately wanted to buy the song. I didn't even know it was the Goo Goo Dolls until it came on the radio and I happened to be on the phone with my friend who actually knows a lot of songs and she told me that it was a song by them. The song is "Better Days," and again, it has good lyrics and a great cello part. So I bought the album today, and I love it. Everytime I hear "Better Days," it makes me smile. I think it has been on the radio since around Christmas, because it is sort of a Christmas song, but I don't care. I could listen to it over and over again. And I have. Here's the second verse and chorus:

And it's someplace simple where we could live
And something only you can give
And thats faith and trust and peace while we're alive
And the one poor child that saved this world
And there's 10 million more who probably could
If we all just stopped and said a prayer for them

So take these words
And sing out loud
Cause everyone is forgiven now
Cause tonight's the night the world begins again

I could probably play the cello part. It is very cool. The rest of the album isn't bad either.

Who are you?

I am mentoring a student right now, and we've come to the part in the curriculum where I have asked her to write a two page essay entitled, "Who are you?" I decided that I might want to do the same. So here goes:

I care about the past, because it impacts both the present and the future. I don't think you can fully understand a person or their viewpoints unless you know their history. I tend to ask a lot of questions of people about their past because this is what enables me to relate to them.

I am flexible. I like to be in new places, meet new people, and try new things...to a certain point. However, because I am adaptable, I hate committing to things. If I make commitments, they are strong, and for the most part, I try not to make them-- I must be heavily persuaded. But once I make a commitment, I am completely reliable and loyal.

I like to read. A lot. Through my reading, I collect new information and ideas. I love ideas. I have a lot of them. This is why the library is a good place for me to work. I can collect information and ideas that I am able to pass on to others. I don't feel the need to act on any of my ideas. I simply like them because they are creative, different, or because they give me a different way of looking at the world. I love poetry because of the ideas. My favorite songs are the ones with profound lyrics. Sometimes, whether the advice is asked for or not, I will bombard you with ideas. This unsolicited advice can be annoying sometimes to other people around me, and I have had to learn to curb it, and wait for when people do ask me for advice.

I also tend to think a lot about things. I need a great deal of solitude--thinking time--in order to function with other people around. If you really want to reach out to me, or have a meaningful conversation with me, then ask me what I'm thinking, and don't let me cheat by giving you some kind of vague or superficial answer, which I will do if I don't trust you, or if I perceive you don' t really want to know, or that you don't have the time to listen. This is how I test people sometimes. Persistence will get you a real answer and show me that you really do care. The negative of all this thinking is that I live a lot in my head, and it can be a lonely place.

My faults are many. I am stubbornly independent, don't like to ask for help, don't like to take risks, and have a deeply rooted fear of failing. I am selfish, especially with my time. I toe the line between having self-confidence and being insufferably proud. And while I am self-assured in a lot of ways, I am insecure in others.

I don't really see myself as a passionate person and it took me a long time to realize that I have a passion for music. Not for playing it perfectly, but just playing, being challenged to bring it to the next level, sharing it with others, and making it something beautiful. I like orchestral music because it challenges my skill, and I get depressed when no one is able to come to a concert that I've worked really hard on. I have to be able to show people what I can really do. Orchestra is my proving ground.

Of course, I wouldn't be who I am today without God's touch on my life. I am his child. He has a plan and purpose for my life. He made me who I am. If he hadn't been a part of my life, I would have a completely different set of friends, a completely different job, a different kind of education, and possibly even different passions in life.

This is the part of the essay where I really need to come up with some kind of conclusion, but I'm not feeling it today. My loyal readers may write one in the comments if they would like.

Musical Temperament

Yeah, okay, I have pushed myself to the point that I got short-tempered last night with a friend at our rehearsal. Except that when I'm short-tempered I just sort of seeth inside, I don't tend to lash out unless I'm feeling extremely attacked...I forgot to print out the music for Sunday morning even though she e-mailed them to us, and so I had to share with the other guitar player and then transpose all his music cause everything was capo-ed (Capo? how do you turn it into a past tense verb?). Bottom line: I got frustrated with myself. I'm really tired and worn out and facing some high level anxiety about performing my solo this evening for that wedding I'm going to be playing in on Saturday. I also just found out that they have a flute player too, and so now I'm thinking to myself, "Why don't they just have her play the song?" because it was really written for flute or violin. Anyway, I'm out of time to practice, and I have to perform tonight.

When I take a step outside of myself right now, I'm really intrigued by how quickly my anxiety is escalating the closer it gets to performance time. I just read a book about the Musical Temperment (1996) and the author, Anthony E. Kemp, uses various studies to show that in general, musicians tend to have higher levels of anxiety than others, are more sensitive, are more introverted, and tend to be more independent. He wanted to see if it was true that people who play the same instruments have similar temperaments. According to this study, there was some truth to that. Here's what they say about cellists:

Ben-Tovim and Boyd (1990) maintain that the cello requires a quiet and reflective intelligence and work that is equally conscientious and sustained as that required by the violin. They also suggest that cellists are often of a shy temperament. The 34 cellists in my research very much confirmed these suggestions, displaying significant levels of introversion over and above that shown by all the string players. In fact, they emerged as even more aloof than the rest of the string players who, as we have seen were already characterized by aloofness. Their other trait, also associated with introversion, was self-sufficiency which emerged along with a definite level of astuteness. This is an interesting combination: the cellist's introversion combines with a social awareness, two qualities that, at face value, do not relate well together. Perhaps Ben-Tovim and Boyd have an important insight in this respect when they suggest that cellists are characterized by a 'quiet and unstressed sociability.'

Interesting.