Today has been so busy, and I can't believe how the time has flown! I have accomplished a lot this week, and I cannot wait for next week. Not that it will be an extraordinary week, but all the busyness of the past two weeks will be forgotten...I hope.
A friend of mine from church asked me if I would like to move in with her. She is an awesome girl and made me a great offer to live in her house for a great price. There are more positives than negatives about this place, but the negatives are substantial... one of them being the commute I would have to work, the second being the peace of mind and great roommate I currently have.
The positives would be potential for accountability in my Christian walk, significant reduction in rent, the potential to own a dog and move my grand piano down here, be closer to where my friends live and live in the community that I will soon be serving in ministry.
I feel like I have a lot on my plate to think about, and maybe this would be a good change for me.
Friday, January 21, 2005
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
Authenticity
I think Sunday's music at church was one of the best sets the band has put together in a long time. I don't know what was going on, but the music was awesome! We were all energetic, loose, and really worked well together. It is always more fun when the band rocks!
The sermon really made me think. Ryan challenged me to be a part of his prayer and fasting ministry team, and I was a tad reluctant because I guess I'm scared of committment. Although, if I commit to something, I do it, whatever it is.
So this Sunday, the pastor talked about Isaiah 58:1-12 and what the difference is between authentic faith and inauthentic faith. This particular passage highlights the difference between fasting and praying out of obligation verses sincerity of heart.
This sermon really challenged me to look at my life and the things I really care about. My priorities reveal the true intentions of my heart and if I'm honest with myself, I really don't see myself caring about the things that God cares about. This needs to change. Slowly but surely, I'll get there...only because of the grace of God.
The sermon really made me think. Ryan challenged me to be a part of his prayer and fasting ministry team, and I was a tad reluctant because I guess I'm scared of committment. Although, if I commit to something, I do it, whatever it is.
So this Sunday, the pastor talked about Isaiah 58:1-12 and what the difference is between authentic faith and inauthentic faith. This particular passage highlights the difference between fasting and praying out of obligation verses sincerity of heart.
This sermon really challenged me to look at my life and the things I really care about. My priorities reveal the true intentions of my heart and if I'm honest with myself, I really don't see myself caring about the things that God cares about. This needs to change. Slowly but surely, I'll get there...only because of the grace of God.
Friday, January 14, 2005
Common Cold
It always amazes me how much a common cold can really wipe me out. I've had this cold for nine days now, and I'm still not feeling very good. I have no energy to do anything. I tried to stay home and fight it for about five days, but it didn't work. I can't wait to go home from work after today because I can just stay home all weekend and try to heal. Plus I have been falling behind at my job because one of my student assistants quit, so now I'm doing all her work and mine and I'm trying to hire a new student. It's going to be a tough decision!
Friday, January 07, 2005
Learning to let go
I'm feeling kind of sick. Nothing like a winter cold to remind me of my frailty, and how thankful I am for my decent health. I have to deal with a few back problems every once in a while, but I usually only get sick once or twice a year. This could be the result of post-holiday let-down.
Holidays always stress me out because my mom gets supersensitive. This year's annual breakdown occurred at the Christmas Eve service at my old church. My siblings and I went with my mom to the service. Then my dad shows up with my step-mom. At first, they were sitting next to us, so my mom really couldn't see them. Then they moved and sat right in front of us and started snuggling relentlessly. It became too much for my mom who decided she couldn't take it anymore and left. Then my sister followed her. Then I left to try and find them in the middle of the service. No luck. I was worried and angry. We eventually did meet up after the service, but the damage had been done.
I was mad at my dad for such a visual display of PDA in front of my mom. He even asked us what was wrong and where she went. He had no idea that it was his behavior that caused her departure. My brother and I lied to my dad and told him we didn't know what was wrong even though we did. I don't even like to be in the same place with both of my parents. I had an opportunity to talk to my mom later about what happened. I told her that I thought that if she was truly content with the way she was living her life, then their behavior shouldn't bother her as much as it does. It's like she needs acknowledgement from them but I don't understand why. My step-mom will never be her friend again, and there will be no opportunity of a second chance for her with my dad.
I might have been able to get through to her this time...I wish she could just let it go.
Holidays always stress me out because my mom gets supersensitive. This year's annual breakdown occurred at the Christmas Eve service at my old church. My siblings and I went with my mom to the service. Then my dad shows up with my step-mom. At first, they were sitting next to us, so my mom really couldn't see them. Then they moved and sat right in front of us and started snuggling relentlessly. It became too much for my mom who decided she couldn't take it anymore and left. Then my sister followed her. Then I left to try and find them in the middle of the service. No luck. I was worried and angry. We eventually did meet up after the service, but the damage had been done.
I was mad at my dad for such a visual display of PDA in front of my mom. He even asked us what was wrong and where she went. He had no idea that it was his behavior that caused her departure. My brother and I lied to my dad and told him we didn't know what was wrong even though we did. I don't even like to be in the same place with both of my parents. I had an opportunity to talk to my mom later about what happened. I told her that I thought that if she was truly content with the way she was living her life, then their behavior shouldn't bother her as much as it does. It's like she needs acknowledgement from them but I don't understand why. My step-mom will never be her friend again, and there will be no opportunity of a second chance for her with my dad.
I might have been able to get through to her this time...I wish she could just let it go.
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