Eviction

Apparently my roommate got in a fight with her boyfriend the other night. I wasn't home but the manager asked me if I knew what was going on.

I'm going to evict her, I can't handle the instability of the situation, and it is unlikely that she will be able to change her behavior.

I just want some peace of mind, ya know?

Ranting

I came home last night to find my roommate and her boyfriend on the phone with his parents. I told her that I was going to go do my laundry, and then she said she wanted to come. I agreed to let her come, but it took a long time to get her out the door. Her boyfriend came with us.

Right before we left, she and I had a conversation. She mentioned that she felt like I was sending out "negative vibes" so I told her it was because I didn't understand the way she prioritized things. If I were in her shoes, I would be applying for everything I was interested in. The "I just need a job" situation. But she tells me (and this was not reassuring) that God always provides. "I know its stressing you out, but something always comes through for me at the last minute, and sometimes I just gotta trust that God will provide," she says.

I feel like this is illogical. God provides, but we also need to make an effort to make the most of our gifts and opportunities.

She also admitted that she doesn't want to try for a fear of failure, but I tried to tell her that to fail is to not try. Every attempt is a success because when you are job searching, you only need one job. The odds of getting a job are increased with every application you fill out, or every resume that you submit. I don't think she's buying it, and I still don't understand.

I don't like being home when she's there, last night she and her boyfriend were arguing and I hate listening to disagreements when I'm trying to sleep.

On top of it all, I'm getting sick and I don't want to stay home sick.

I'm kind of hoping she doesn't have enough money for rent this month so I have a good reason to evict her. Is that bad?

Go Chargers!

Friday night, Adam, Eric, and Tracy all came into town, and Duncan got to join us after practice. We all went to Cheesecake Factory and had a great time just hangin' out. Everyone but D stayed with me that night so that they could go start tailgating early in the morning before the game. I went to church and then went to the game after.

The Charger game was totally fun. We had great seats in the family section, so we got to meet all these other friends and family members. The Chargers won the game, and D got in on a series in the 4th quarter. He mostly blocked, but got to go out for a few passes too. Same as in college... when he's wide open, nobody throws to him. Frustrating.

Anyway, I'm watching the final preseason game at a coworker's condo on Friday night. She has TiVo and is saving and recording all of Duncan's games for me... so I have them on video.

Good Times

Went to watch Duncan practice last night, and they threw the ball to him twice in the end zone at the end of practice. He missed them both, but like I told him, "I'm glad they are throwing to you in the end zone!"

I didn't get to talk to him for very long, but I know he was glad to see me.

I am very thankful that my brothers and sister and I all love each other.

The game is going to be fun on Sunday, Chargers vs. Rams in San Diego.

Don't Stare

Last night was our annual PLNU community dinner. It was much better than last years because the program was better.

But I couldn't figure out why a certain guy, a friend of mine actually, was staring at me all night. It was weird and creepy. Then I figured out about in the middle of the program that it was because he was in my line of sight and because there was a mirror right behind me... he wasn't staring, he was watching the program in the mirror. Ha ha!!!

Back to school

I love fall. Sweaters, school starting, school supplies... but now I remember why I hated buying school books.

Decided to go buy my French book for the new semester before all the students come back so that I didn't have to wait in a long line and dang! My book is expensive. I dropped $120 like that. At least I don't have to pay for the class itself.

I also met the new French instructor yesterday. He is French, from France, and I'm scared. I have not reviewed all summer. Yikes!!! Studying would have made a difference. Maybe I'll do some reviewing this week and this weekend. He does seem very nice though, and I think I will learn a lot in this class. I always start the semester with good intentions but you know what they say about those.

I also need to finish my Library School application. I only need to gather everything together and send it at this point. I will hopefully be starting that in the Spring.

Kids Club

This morning at church, many of the kids from the VBS came to sing at church for their parents. We sang two songs I wrote. So funny. As I was exciting the service to go back to help supervise our Sunday morning kids club, one of the moms came up to me and said, "that song makes me cry everytime!" So cool! Not that she's crying, but that even my silly kids songs can touch people's hearts.

I met this mom on Friday night at our ice-cream social and her husband as well. We found out that her husband had never ever been to church before and because he came to our ice-cream social, and saw that we were nice, normal, casual, people, he agreed to come to church on Sunday. So cool. Their daughter wanted to sit next to me at lunch today. She's 8 or 9.

I started doing music for kids because I like to sing, I don't have to play guitar well, and because its fun. My talent for remembering the funny songs from my childhood has combined with my other musical talents, and I think I have found my calling... well... it doesn't seem like much of a calling. I have tried to write serious songs, but I'm not very good at them. I am a decent poet sometimes, but none of my poetry translates well to music. With the kids songs, they can be funny and they can rhyme. Which I can do.

It seems like such a small, silly, thing that I do--entertain kids on Sunday mornings--but God is always bigger than I think he is, and I am amazed that God is using this silliness in bigger ways than I imagined.

The Wedding

I went to a wedding last night for two friends of mine from San Diego. I played cello in it, and it was so much fun. Funny story though, I have a friend who is over 30 and really looking for "the right guy." She was assigned to sit at the same table as me, along with 3 other people I knew, and 3 I didn't know. My friend was all excited cause the guy sitting next to her was a brain surgeon. I'm serious. He was really nice, and the two of them seemed like they were getting along well. Came time to dance, and because I was the only girl left at the table, he asked if I wanted to dance. I said, "yes" of course because in my opinion, if you get asked to dance, you should dance. So we danced. It was fun. My friend came up to us a bit later during a break and said she was leaving. Knowing that she was interested in this guy, I told her, "well, you can't leave without dancing...you should dance one dance!" Perfect opportunity set up by me to let the two of them get to know each other. Alas, she refused the dance. I couldn't believe it. Her behavior really doesn't make sense to me because there's no harm in dancing... well, unless the guy just seems really creepy or wasted...but anyway, she should have danced with him. He was so cool. Maybe a bit old for me though. :)

There's this other guy that was at our table that I have known for awhile, and we see each other at social events. He is very intelligent but very quiet and sort of shy. I have a feeling he is a deep thinker and I always want to know what he's thinking about because I always forget to ask. I was dancing with a different guy than the one above, but then he noticed another girl on the floor who didn't have a partner, so in a moment of complete weirdness, he pulled her in so we were all dancing together. Too weird for me, and thankfully, I saw the guy from my table sort of on the outskirts of the floor looking bored. So I left the weirdness and pulled this guy onto the dance floor. Totally cool experience because once we started dancing he got a big grin on his face. So much better than the "bored face" of earlier.

I had to leave a bit early because of committments on Sunday morning, but as I was trying to say goodbye to another guy friend of mine he says, "you can't leave, I was going to ask you to dance!" I tried to tell him we could raincheck it, but then he says, "look, how often have I asked you to dance?" I said, "never." He said, "That's right, never, so you can't leave!" I laughed and agreed to dance the next dance with him.

Anyway, it was a good wedding overall, mostly because people weren't so uptight. Everyone was trying to have a good time. :)

My wedding stats:
20ish "good cello-ing" comments
10ish "love your outfit" comments
(very classy lavender tank with sequins, and long formal black full orchestra skirt)
6 dances with single guys
3 "goodnight" pecks on the cheek from single guys
2 "saved myself from tripping over my skirt" moments
1 small hole in my skirt from a "tripping over my skirt" moment
0 bridal bouquets caught.

Prodigal Son

For you, Ryan, who requested to see more kids songs on the blog...this is a song I wrote:

Once upon a time
A long time ago
There was a kid
Whose dad loved him so
But he got so tired
Of being told what to do
So he told his dad,
"Give me my money I'm leaving you"

His dad got a sad, sad, look on his face and said,

"Okay son, but I just need to say...

I will always love you
No matter what you do
Whenever you come home again,
I'll be here waiting for you.

The kid took his money
And went into town
Bought lots of stuff
Had lots of friends around
One day he found
All his money was gone
All his friends left him
He wound up feeding some hogs

He got a sad, sad, look on his face and said,

"I wonder if my dad told me the truth..."

I will always love you
No matter what you do
Whenever you come home again
I'll be here waiting for you.

The kid thought to himself,
"Well, I know my dad
I'll beg for a job,
And he'll take me back"
So he started home
And when he got near
His dad cried out,
"Son I'm so glad you're finally here!"

His dad got a glad, glad, look in his eye and said,

"Cook a feast, we're havin' a party!"

I will always love you
No matter what you do
Whenever you come home again
I'll be here waiting for you.

VBS

My new roommate's boyfriend found a place to live. Yay! I'm glad, cause I was about to evict them both.

VBS is going well, but it is more tiring than I remember it being last year. Music has been going well, the kids are remembering the verse of the week because I put it to music, and things are good.

So.

My grandparents are coming into town tonight, so I think I am having dinner with them tonight.

That's all I have to say at the moment.

What have I gotten myself into?

Really wrestling right now with compassion vs. safety right now. My new roommate has a homeless boyfriend. He seems to be alright, but he has no job and nowhere to go. I've told her in no uncertain terms that its not okay for him to live with us. She seems to understand, and I made her sign a rental agreement yesterday that states that overnight guests must be cleared 24 hours in advance, and that they should not stay for an excessive amount of time. She was going to tell him today that he cannot live with us.

I can understand being down and out, and I know its hard, I've been there, but this guy does not seem to have any motivation to do anything and I think he's slightly depressed. I really hope this doesn't get out of hand, and while I feel compassionate toward him, I don't want him living with us at all. There are plenty of shelters in San Diego, and I might check with my church to see which agencies they work with. I don't understand why people sometimes will not accept help when it is offered them, unless this guy is on drugs, which is possible. Haven't been around him long enough to know.

Busy weekend

It absolutely amazes me how quiet my social life can be... no one I know really plans anything, but when they do, it is always on the same weekend, or during the same week.

I had one of the busiest weekends I've had in awhile, and my eye is still twitching. Probably from lack of sleep. On Friday night, I was supposed to go to a bridal shower for a friend of mine, but I also had to prepare my extra room for my new roommate. So on my way to the shower, I picked up some spackle, and a hammer, and then fixed up the room after the shower. Saturday, I probably should have done my laundry, but didn't. I woke up feeling sick and fatigued, so I just read all morning. Then I went to the grocery store and picked up some fruit to make a fruit salad for a party I was going to later in the afternoon. It was my kind of party. There were 5 of us there, 3 girls from my old Bible study, and a guy who is dating one of them. We sat around by the pool and caught up on each other's lives. It was really cool. Then I went to a birthday party, but only stayed for about an hour because I was so tired. I came home to find my new roommate in teh process of moving in, so the apartment was kind of a disaster. But that's alright. Sunday, I led our Kids Club, and it was probably the best job I've done so far. It was really fun. I went to lunch with two groups... I left one group early, and met the other group later. Then I had to find a skirt to wear out for a going away party last night for a friend of mine who is ironically moving close to where I grew up. We went to the W hotel in San Diego, and it was really fun. The friend who planned it told all the girls we had to wear skirts or dresses. Since I don't really have any casual dresses, and I don't like wearing skirts, I had to go find a skirt to wear with the shirt I wanted to wear. But it was a good shopping trip, because I not only found a great skirt, but also found a shirt I can wear with either black pants or skirt to the wedding I am playing in soon. Everyone was surprised and I told them to take pictures because who knows when they will see me in a skirt again.

I also found out on Saturday that my brother got signed by the San Diego Chargers. I'm so excited because I'm in San Diego. So his girlfriend is visiting me for a few days, and I'm taking some time off so that we can hang out and go watch the open practices.

New Roommate

One of the girls I originally interviewed called me yesterday on my lunch break. She is a Christian girl, and had to be out of her place by August 1. I really liked her, but she is in complete transition right now-- no job, no car, no degree. She's 24. But I need a roommate, and she needs a room, and she says she'll pay the rent. Even though it seems risky to me, I couldn't say "no" cause it sounded like she needed a break and a chance. A little bit of grace. I've been on the down-and-out side, and its not fun, and I understand how hard it is to make it in San Diego. Hopefully I will not regret this decision.

Not moving

So both of my housing options just fell through, and I'm feeling just a bit overwhelmed already knowing that its going to take time and energy to find a roommate. I'm not moving out. I plan to stay at my place. If I find a roommate I really like, then I might consider moving, but I'm finding that good roommates are in high demand and short supply. I'm about to post an ad on Craig's list and see what weirdos I get.

In other news, I was surprised a few days ago by a visit from a friend of my brother's who is currently competing for the kicker position for the Dallas Cowboys. He was down in San Diego visiting family, and came to Point Loma to run on our beautiful track. I told him if he makes it onto the team I would go to the Chargers/Cowboys game and root for Dallas. :) Then I told him he owes me an autograph if he makes it.

I also got to work with my friend Michael on a song I wrote for the kiddies who will be attending VBS in 2 weeks. Its a call and response song about the Prodigal Son. The chorus (the only part of the song that is NOT call and response) is this:

I will always love you
No matter what you do
Whenever you come home again
I'll be here waiting for you

Its very catchy. I think it was stuck in Michael's head last night. Ha ha!!! I'm so evil!!! Mwa ha ha ha...

Miscellaneous

I went and saw a fiddle concert on Monday night. So fun. I think I want to learn. These were some of the best musicians in the world.

Still don't know what's up with housing... but I should know if I'm staying or going by the end of this evening. Hopefully.

I'm trying to get ready for VBS again. I have a couple new songs, but they need some work. I'm not good enough on the guitar to be able to put together the best possible combination of chords for the lyrics I've written.

They took the packing out of my wisdom tooth empty socket, and so I'm feeling it a little more today. I still can't really eat hard and crunchy things. It hurts my teeth.

Moving?

What a difficult decision. My roommate just moved out, and so I either need to move, or find a roommate. All the girls I have interviewed so far are unemployed. I have one opportunity to move out, and found out that the girls who currently live in this place might be moving after 10 months. But it sounds fun. I'd have to give up my furniture. But I could move my piano down.

Aaarrrgghhh!!! I don't want to think about it anymore. But the house is looking like my best option because the girls are both relatively stable. Its in a great location.

But only for 10 months? Can't I find something more stable than that?

Softball: Game 1

Okay, so I got asked to play for a church league here in SD. So my first at bat, I swing forward and hit the ball, but because I was off-balance from my swing, I tripped over my feet trying to get to first and fell flat on my face. I never made it to first. I scraped my knee, which I haven't done since high school, and totally felt like an idiot. However, I did manage to redeem my horrible at-bat with a nice catch in the 2nd inning. I played second base, so I caught an infield pop-fly for an out. I also got on base 3 additional times and scored a run. So ya know. Made up for the horridness of my first at-bat.

All I gotta say is at least expectations won't be that high for my ability as a player, so if I make good plays, people will automatically be impressed, just cause I failed so miserably early on in the game.

Pray

I was just reading a book that talks about the beauty of Montana. Now, I know it snows there a lot, and it can get very cold, but it made me crave a change in the way I'm living. I would love to move somewhere like Montana, where there's mountains, and wildlife, and open spaces, all at the same time.

I want to go on vacation somewhere like that, but I would need someone to go with me.

I have a billing method I use in my personal finances to keep track of how much money I'm spending on bills. Basically, I write down all my bills on a post-it, and mark off when they go on my bank statement. I put it in my daily planner in the month to month section. This allows me to figure out A) whether I can afford to save anything, and B) how much I'm spending each month on my bills.

Good trends in my spending:

• I'm able to cover my bills
• I'm investing some of my money, about 5% of what I make, and I just got enrolled in my company's retirement plan, and so I'm actually putting about 10% away for retirement, and about 2.5% in a mutual fund that is more easily accessible
• I'm giving about 5% of my money to my missionary friends in support and I'm trying to give about 5% to my church

Bad trends in my spending:

• I have very little discretionary income
• I use my credit card whenever I have unexpected expenses, like car repairs, therefore, my credit card seems to never be paid off

I just figured out that I'm making $29,640 per year, but after taxes and benefits taken out, I take home $22,080. In a community like San Diego, that's not much. The cost of living is very high here.

So I decided that I need to pray more for direction. I'm still facing some big life decisions. I love my job, but feel like I need to be earning more. At the same time, if I decided to go back to school, this would be the best place for me to stay and finish my education. I really have the desire to experience a new place, so it might be better for me to try and get a job in my field, but I waffle on this decision everyday. If I were truly content, maybe I wouldn't be so restless.

I need to pray that God would guide me in these decisions and bring me to the place where I should be...it still could be here in San Diego.

I'm thankful that I even have some of the options that I do, to experience new places, people, and ideas.

Tow Truck Story -- Conversations 9

“Triple A, this is Candice, how may I assist you this evening?”
“Yeah, hi, I need a tow.”
“What is your membership number?”I read the digits off of my card.
“Are you blocking traffic?”
“No.”
“Are you in a safe place?”
“Yes, I’m at my apartment.”
“Where’s the car?”
“It’s parked on the side of the road.”
“Okay, what city is the car in?
“San Diego.”
“What’s the exact location of the vehicle?”
“It’s at the intersection of Texas and Polk.”
“And where do you need it towed to?”
“4035A Pacific Highway.”
“Okay, the tow truck will be there between now, 7:58pm and 8:27. Is there anything else we can help you out with this evening?”
“No, thank you, that’s it.”
“Okay ma’am, have a nice evening.”

Then I called my friend Cathy.

“Cathy, the tow truck will be here in about 30 minutes. Are you ready?”
“Yeah, I’m just going to get directions to the garage, grab a sweater, and then I’ll come over.”“Actually, I’m going to head over to the intersection to wait for the tow truck.”
“Where is your car?” she asked.
“Its on the corner of Texas and Polk” and I gave her the directions.
“Okay, I’ll see you there.”

Cathy’s car had refused to start the previous day and I bailed her out. Perhaps my car was experiencing empathy pains. I was at a stop sign, and my car just sputtered and died. So I put my hazard lights on and got out of my car to try and figure out what to do. I was blocking traffic, so I began to wave people around me until a guy and a girl in a jeep asked if I needed help. I had noticed that there was a parallel parking spot right behind me on a downhill slope, and I thought I could possibly get the car in that spot while I figured out what to do. So I said, “Yes, actually, I do need some help. Would you mind helping me park the car in that spot?”

They were engaged, and so cute, and really nice. The guy helped me parallel park my car while it was in neutral, and then they offered me a ride home. The guy says, “You know, I just hope that if my girl ever got stranded, there would be someone willing to help.”

I agree.

They turned out to be the kind of neighbors who frequently walk their dog in front of my house and the kind of neighbors you want to be your neighbors.

I made my way over to the intersection where my car was parked and settled in to wait for the tow truck. Cathy arrived about 10 minutes later and was waiting on the side of the road. She couldn’t turn her car off for fear that it wouldn’t start back up.

There was a guy on the opposite street corner waiting for someone as well. Occasionally, he would ask me what time it was.

After about 30 minutes, Triple A called me back to inform me that my tow truck driver was running behind schedule, but that he would be there in five minutes. “Great!” I thought. I ran to where Cathy was waiting and told her, “Five more minutes!” Then I went back to the street corner to wait.

I was getting antsy because I had called a garage, and the guy told me he would wait for me, and that he would be there for another hour. That was 30 minutes ago, so I felt like I was running out of time. Finally, the tow truck arrived, and I was glad. Then the driver started talking.

“Awww, why did you park it there? Okay, try to start it.” I try to start the car, and it turns over but won’t catch.
“Do you have gas in it?” implying that I was just a ditzy girl who had run out of gas.
“Yes!” I said, I have a quarter of a tank.”
“Do you know who owns that van? It is going to be tough to get it out.”
“No, I don’t, do you think you can push it out?”
“I don’t believe this,” he mumbled to himself, but more so that I could hear him. Then he tells me, “I ain’t even supposed to be here!” I can tell he is getting increasingly upset.
“Well, let’s try to move it” I said, ignoring his last statement.
I got in the car, and he got behind me to push. “Are you ready?” I asked.
“Yeah!”
I let my foot off the break and said, “Okay, go!”
I feel him try to push the car, but it didn’t really move anywhere.
“I can’t move this!” he says to me, “You should have just left it at the stop sign! You won’t get no ticket!” and then he heads over to his truck and starts yelling at someone on his radio. He was obviously mad.

I decide to get reinforcements, so I recruit the guy waiting across the street who had watched us block traffic for about 15 minutes. I cross the street and start talking with him.

“Hi,” I said. “Are you busy at the moment? “Would you mind helping the tow truck guy push my car? He’s kind of in a bad mood, and I need some help. Were you waiting for someone?”
“Yeah,” he says, “But I don’t know where my ride is.”
“Well, can you come help?”“Sure, I suppose so.”

We wander back across the street where the driver is getting increasingly frustrated.
“I found some help” I told him.

He didn’t answer me, and just got in his truck and started maneuvering around.
Some people pulled in across the street, and another guy comes over to ask if we need help. “Yeah, the tow truck guy is in a really bad mood” I said, “And I think we need help, but he won’t tell us how to help him,” referring to the other guy I had pulled off of the street to help.

Finally, the tow truck is in place. The three guys position themselves behind my car. I hear the driver say, “I ain’t even supposed to be doin’ this, I ain’t got no workers’ comp!”

I tell them, “Okay, go!”

They push the car about 5 feet out at an angle, and the car is now in great position to be towed. I watch the driver hook my car to his truck. “Where are you towing it?” he asks.

“4035A Pacific Highway” I tell him.

“I’ll follow you over” he says.
“Okay,” I responded. I wasn’t initially upset at the situation, but his attitude made me upset.

I thanked the two random guys for their assistance, and then went to talk to Cathy, who has been waiting for me this entire time.

“This guy is so pissed off right now,” I tell her.
“Why?” she asks, “Is he mad at you?”
“I’m trying really hard not to take it personally,” I tell her. “He wants to follow us to the garage, so which way do we start?”
“We’re going to turn left, and then left on El Cajon,” she tells me.
“Okay, thanks,” I said, “I’ll be back.”

I tell the driver, “Okay, so we’re going to turn left, and then left on El Cajon.”
He barely acknowledges my presence as he finishes hooking my car up to his truck. As soon as he’s done, I tell him where we’re headed, and then get in the car with Cathy.

“He is so pissed off right now,” I told her. Then I told her what had happened. As we were driving, I told her, “If we get lost, he is going to be really mad, so I hope we find the garage okay.”

We get to the right street, and I start watching the street signs for numbers, then we passed the block where the garage was, so Cathy and I make a U-turn, and I said, “ooohhh, he’s going to be so mad!”

Cathy looks at me and says, “Its his job to tow cars, and I don’t care how mad he is!”

We see the garage, and she drops me off, parks and goes to flag down the driver. I tell the two guys, “Okay, this tow truck guy is so pissed off right now.” Then I tell them the whole story. Then I said, “I’m so mad right now I’m shaking!”

They tell me, “Well, you’re here now, its going to be okay, just let it go. We can take it from here.” I thought it would be a good idea.

Meanwhile, Cathy is outside, trying to flag down the driver. Apparently he was very close to driving off with my car, but Cathy got him to bring the car over to the entrance. She gets out to talk to him, but he’s being a belligerent jerk, and Cathy was yelling at him too.

As soon as he got out to unhook my car, he had nothing to say to either me or the guys at the garage. As soon as he was done, he got in his truck and drives off in a huff.

“Triple A, this is Michael, how may I assist you this evening?”
“Yeah, hi, I just called you guys to get my car towed this evening, and it was, and thank you, that was awesome, but the tow truck driver? He wasn’t very nice at all. He was really mean. I didn’t have a problem with you guys at all, just the driver.”
“Oh, let me get your name so I can get my supervisor to look into it.”
“What’s your name?"
I gave him the information.
“Thank you, I will have my supervisor look into this. Is there anything else I can help you with tonight?”
“No, that’s all, thank you.”

And I hung up the phone.

Mexico

I went to Mexico over Memorial Day weekend with Cornerstone Bible Church as a high-school leader. I was put in charge of VBS and worship. So I had a $300 budget, and spent almost all of it on VBS supplies and recreational sports equipment. Got everything into my car, including my sleeping bag, extra blankets and a pillow, got to Mexico, and quickly realized that I forgot my bag of clothes.

I felt like such an idiot for not remembering. But it was a great lesson in humility and God's provision. I had t-shirts, and wore the same pants all weekend. I realized even more how blessed we are in the states, because for the people we were helping, a daily change of clothing is not always possible. There is not much water, and what water there is must be paid for.

I had a great time in spite of not having brought my clothes, but God is good, and he always provides. I even got clean underwear out of a package and clean socks too. For some reason, I had floss in my car, and so I didn't really need a toothbrush.

However, between giggling high school girls, the roosters crowing from 2am on, and my volunteer shift at breakfast (5:30 wake-up call), I got maybe 12 hours of sleep. I don't think I could constantly live like this, but it was definitely fun.